1. I entered Shoprite looking angry, wearing a Nigerian jersey. I picked stuffs and was walking out without paying. A security man tried stopping me, I looked at him then put my hand in my waist bag. He said “sir you can go”.
I was just trying to bring out the money oh!
2. No matter how many times conductor shout “enter with your change” there must be one idiot that will still enter with 1k.
3. Soon, MTN will be like! The number you have Dialled has been owing us since 4months, help us beg him to pay back when he picks…
4. Some girls will be forming slay queen up and down, but once it’s 12midnight they will be urinating inside custard container.
5. When you build a house let your wife decorate the ceiling, she has seen more ceiling designs than you.
Am I communicating?
6. Wedding attendance:
Church = 50
Reception = 5400
Can you imagine??
I will share my food in church.
7. Have you ever been so broke that you be like, “If only I didn’t use that 5k back in 2018…”
8. Every girl you date, you ask her this question:
“Babe are you a virgin?”
My brother, do you have a company that repairs virginity?
9. If I eventually Become A Doctor
Me: Good morning, how are you?
Patient: I’m fine, sir.
Me: Okay! Next person please.
10. My church father intentionally sprinkled the HOLY WATER heavily on us last Sunday, come see how makeups were messed up.